Look for the Helpers – How to Stay Positive in a World of Hate

Another mass shooting. Another terrorist attack. A missile let loose from a drone finds its way onto another wedding. White supremacists and Islamic Jihadists, authoritarians gaining power, civil wars raging. The news bombards you from every direction with fresh reports of the days dead, the summary of suffering. How is it possible to stay positive in a world that seems to be falling apart?

In a world that is growing ever more connected through technology, you will find yourself privy to details from every corner of the globe. The media that brings you that information is a business, and the point of a business is to sell. Our brains are wired to identify danger and so we click on the article about death, we read the story about war, and so that’s what they produce. The truth that this can obscure is…

The world has never been as peaceful and non-violent as it is today.

Does that statement seem wrong to you? Does it seem to you like the world is getting more and more violent and destructive as the days go on? Well, that is simply not true. The world has been getting progressively more peaceful and less violent and we are living in an era of safety unparalleled in human history. You must look past the click-bait headlines and see how much humanity is progressing, and focus your energy on that.

Of course, there are still many issues and conflict areas that need to be addressed, and there will be no shortage of media coverage for those tragedies as they unfold. So, while still wanting to stay connected, how can we see all of this violence and blood shed and still maintain a positive outlook on life? The key is in three steps…

Accept that pain is a part of life

Learn how to not attach to that pain and create suffering

Look for the helpers, focus on the good, and be a part of the good

Pain is a part of life. As in your life it will be in others. There is no master plan, no designer of the pain in the world. It doesn’t have a purpose, it just is, and you must accept its existence. If you attach yourself to that pain, you will create suffering in your mind. You will magnify the pain and give it power. Accept its existence, feel it, then let it go and end its power over you.

Mr. Rogers once said that whenever he would see a tragedy on the TV, his mother would tell him “look for the helpers.” Whenever there is a mass shooting, one person may have perpetrated violence, but hundreds of people, from EMS, Police, Fire, Nurses, Doctors, NGOs, Relief Agencies, and Volunteers will flood the area. The number of helpers, those who respond to evil and violence with love, compassion and support, always vastly outnumber the violent ones.

Look for the helpers.

When you focus on all the helpers, the massive majority of people who will never commit heinous acts of violence, and all the good being done in the world, your mindset will pull away from what the constant media blitz will do to your perspective. If you want to see more, then become a helper. Be the change you want to see in the world and volunteer your time to decrease the pain. Seek out a career in the service of others. One day, someone may look at you and become hopeful that the world may be a better place than they once imagined.

For more on this topic, read “The Better Angels of Our Nature” by Steven Pinker, an in depth and eye-opening account of how violence has been decreasing around the world.